In very basic terms coaching is about supporting clients to get from where they are now to where they want to be… in other words to achieve their goal.
Sounds simple doesn’t it… except some people aren’t entirely sure where they want to be… they just know that they don’t want to be where they are now!
Some people just want to be happy with what they have because they discovered that the new car, new partner, bigger house, promotion, more money… whatever it is that they thought would make them happy made no difference whatsoever!
Maybe you know exactly what you want to do and how to do it yet you don’t do it… maybe you procrastinate and self-sabotage…
If that sounds like you, first of all please forgive yourself. After all you are a perfect example of an average human being. The thing is I don’t think you want to be average do you? I think you want more from life! I think you have a bigger vision of who you are and what you want to do in the world!
Am I right? Good, keep reading because I have some good news for you.
The ONLY thing holding you back from the life you want is the choices you make.
If you put everyone else before you choose to set boundaries
Seriously… instead of procrastinating choose a time to do that thing you have been putting off and just do it.
Sick of being taken advantage of by your boss then choose to be assertive and say how you feel, or choose to find another job.
Want to lose weight then choose carrot sticks instead of cupcakes!
Ok, I know, I’m sorry… it’s not that easy!
Most of the choices we make on a daily basis are made in our subconscious mind, they are part of our default thinking patterns which is good most of the time because its the only way your brain could cope with everything it needs to do to keep you functioning effectively
… but when you want to create different results in life you need to do something different consistently and that means making conscious choices consistently.
You might have set a new goal, lets say you want to exercise daily, for the first few days you do it… you choose to do it even if its difficult. After a few days though you slip back into old habits. It’s not your fault though, it’s because your subconscious is taking over and choosing to have an extra 30 minutes in bed rather than get up and exercise. Before you know it you are beating yourself up and reinforcing the limiting belief that you “can’t stick to an exercise plan” .
How To Break The Pattern
If you want to get better results then you can choose to train your brain to make smarter subconscious choices. To train your brain you need 3 things:
A | Awareness of the situation
- Know exactly what you want from life
- Understand why you want it
- Be aware of where you sabotage yourself
- Work out the payoff to NOT changing
B | Belief in yourself
- Do you need to work on your self belief first?
- Do you believe you can achieve what you want?
- Which self-limiting beliefs do you need to challenge?
C | Commitment to getting back on track
- How can you remember to challenge your default thinking patterns?
- How committed are you to making it happen, if the answer isn’t 8+ your commitment level is probably not high enough and you should consider revising your goal
- How can you build your resilience so that when you go off track (which is normal) you get back on track as soon as possible?
Tools For Effective Change
If you already know you need to make better choices take a look at this video from Brad Yates. EFT is one of my favourite tools when I need help to make a shift in my own life and I can always find the perfect video by Brad to tap along with